The House Of Immortality

Henry: Coming back to the mansion wasn't an easy decision, but I had a lot to make up for. I couldn't leave things on such a bad level for my brother and I, and I couldn't leave a lasting imprint of a drunken man on anyone who had seen me. I didn't want to be remembered as that sort of person, but who would anyway? I had driven all the way from San Francisco to here, and so the first thing I did when I came back was take a shower. The air conditioning had gone out in the car on the way so I was a little sweaty, but what else did you expect from a 68' GTO? Counter to the plane I had taken back home, I had taken it upon myself to actually take my fathers car as my own. It wasn't exactly in the best of shape, and I had got it actually running after so many years it had been sitting, in the month I had been home, between times I spent with Micah and cleaning up after Vivian. After I had showered though I hadn't really began unpacking the things I brought with me from home, which only consisted of a picture of Micah I had taken while we were sitting at a red light. Just the look on his small face as I snapped the photo had been priceless, and it made me yearn for him every time I saw it. I don't know why I had insisted on keeping him company as Mel decided on being something other than his mother. It had doomed me to feeling an ache now that I wasn't with him. Not only the photo, but my clothing and the other pictures I had of my parents and the one Brady had mailed me from the wedding. I had actually been thinking about framing that one for weeks, since I received it. Not only was I partially drunk that day, but I was clinging onto Mandie like I didn't have anything else. I had to keep it though, because it was evidence my brother was happy and evidence that one of us came out right from the screwed up life I had created for us. It didn't matter that it reminded me of my failures and the only heartache I had suffered, it was Brady's greatest accomplishment and I was proud of him. I pulled the suitcases onto the bed and opened each of them, which took more energy than I actually had after such a long drive. Removing the few shirts above the photo frames I had placed to keep them safe, I took them out one by one and set them on the shelf they had been on before I had left. The picture of Micah on the very left, next a few photos of my parents and then photos of all of us before they died, followed by the wedding picture and ended by the picture of both Micah and me. I reached a hand up and ruffled my still damp hair as I looked over the pictures, reminded of each memory and surprised by the different features I held in each of them. I was happy as a child, content with my family of four and the life my father was laying out for us. The picture of me at the wedding, it must've been the only photo I had I was drunk in and I looked ridiculous, because I knew deep inside that not even twenty fours hours later the woman I was clinging to was a married one and out of reach. The ones with Micah though... They were different. I was really happy, happier than I could actually see in any of the photos. I was much better now though, and I had a lot ahead of me before I could really be alright with who I was. I had to do everything right, and I had to make this one month sober deal last longer, possibly forever. There wasn't time to dwell on what had been or what was done, and I was supposed to be old enough to know that by now for sure. I turned back towards the bed and took out the shirts from my suitcases, placing them in the drawer of my dresser just as they had been before I left. Unpacking wasn't a very enjoyable time for me, but I had to accomplish it to officially declare my return here and the next step in the road for me. Once I finished I took a hoodie from the closet and pulled it over my head and then over my unclothed chest, uncomfortable at first because of the odd feeling against my skin but when I got used to it I walked out of the room and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jeans, keeping my head low as I went towards the kitchen to relieve my growling stomach. It had been a while since I actually could remember just going to the fridge at the mansion for food instead of a beer. It was a good feeling, of course, knowing I no longer relied on the comfort drinking brought me. It only caused more problems than it happened to subdue, and what sort of life was it to depend on alcohol anyway? I reached the fridge before I knew it, unaware that I was even drawing near it in the first place because I was so busy with my thoughts instead of where I was going. I opened the fridge and pushed aside the alcohol to reach behind it to find some leftover pizza. Sausage, not exactly my favorite but it would work. I put it on a plate and then put it into the microwave, which I set for forty five seconds to knock off the chill the fridge had brought to the pizza slice. The sound of the microwave turning on reminded me again of Micah, and I had to wonder on how well my cousin was taking care of him. She wasn't particularly fond of having a child, even if she was older than both Collin and me, and I was worried if she even took the responsibility seriously. He was a small child after-all, only a year old this coming October, and it was only right to worry about him naturally. The ding of the microwave pulled me out of my thoughts and I pushed the button to open the door. After I pulled the slightly hot plate out of the microwave I set it on the counter and rubbed the back of my neck as I looked it over. Last time I had pizza was with Trent and Mandie, and looking back on it brought a slight smile to my face. I suppose I was at the point where I no longer willed for her to feel what I felt, but over the entire ordeal. If she wasn't happy with me I have to think that perhaps I wasn't the right person for her, and her husband was. It wasn't right for me to feel anger forever, so I don't. I could look back on what we had done and what had happened while we together with fondness, instead of slight disappointment. I couldn't think about it anymore, or I'd be standing here all day and my pizza would get cold, so I picked up the plate and sat at the table. After I finished eating I set my plate in the sink and washed it by hand, as I had done countless bowls and plates at the manor for Micah and myself. What was I to do next? Go and find my brother, apologize to him for everything that had poisoned our lives, and then move on to something harder. I had to eventually apologize to Mandie, no matter how hard it might possibly be to just be in the same room as her. If it made her husband feel better though he could sit in, and I could apologize to a crowd. I don't know why I hadn't done it sooner, seeing as how I did love her and it should've been easy. If her husband does decide to sit in, I'll be able to evaluate myself who the man is that is raising Trent now and who Mandie was always thinking about even when we were together. It'll give me closure that this man is truly better than who I am, and that Mandie is better off. Not that I has any say in the matter, because I don't. I just had a long road ahead of me that I needed to take one step at a time and forgiving people around me and being forgiven was the step I seemed to come to now. It sounds cliche, thinking of things as bumps in the road, but everything up until now was a simple bump in the road that I happened to hit. I was bandaged and healed to the best of anyone's abilities and now I was supposedly ready for whatever was meant to come my way. I walked out into the living room and sat on the couch, combing a hand through my blonde hair. I couldn't go and try to find my brother at this hour, so  I would have take a night off, perhaps sleep a little while in the comfort of my room, alone for the first time in a few weeks. Micah had ended up with me more times than not, simply because I couldn't be without him and his Colic was horrific. Mel had complained about the constant crying, and I took him into my own room one night to soothe him, which turned into an every night thing. I laid back across the couch and let out a sigh, recalling the departure of Micah and I.